What was your dream career as a kid?
Well, today most are like this…
See, there’s only 1 right answer to this.
Pirates are the shit.
I mean, look at this dude:
That’s Captain Jack Sparrow.
He killed bad guys, found buried treasure, and pantie-dropped every midwestern Mom at their local AMC.
But what was the life of a pirate really like?
Well, it starts off surprisingly legit.
Imagine it’s the Caribbean, 1668.
The king of England’s like…
So he gives you this:
A Letter of Marque.
Which lets you raid Spanish & French ships – you just gotta share the spoils with him.
But this is a sketchy job.
See at any moment the king might cancel your letter.
Which is bad news for someone with zero marketable skills.
So you rebrand.
Now you’re a pirate.
But there’s a problem….
Ships and storms wreck your ship.
Plus barnacles and seaweed on your hull mean you can’t outrun bad guys.
So you gotta repair.
But no port lets you in….because…you’re a pirate.
So what do you do?
You have 2 options.
You beach your ship during high tide…but you’re a sitting duck for bad guys.
You bribe ports like Jamaica.
Which soon become a pirate haven.
But by the 1700s the Royal Navy, British East India Company, and colonial governors got their shit together and slaughtered all the pirates.
So actually, nevermind.
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Dylan & Henry 🌈
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